I have a small mouth with just enough room for my regular teeth, and I didn't have much of a problem until my goddamn motherfucking wisdom teeth grew in, and then OH BOY was there pain! I've had two of my bottom teeth removed for unrelated reasons (yay growing up poor), so the lower teeth have sort of shifted and relieved some of the pressure.
Not so with the upper teeth. ( Cut for the events of the night and tooth-related squick . )
I HAVE A GODDAMN CUNTYODELING UNICORN-FELCHING ( SQUICK ) IN MY MOUTH NOW.
And to add insult to injury, I have a gorgeous, sweet, and patient boyfriend that I can't go down on, because I can't open my mouth wide enough to fit.
- Mood:
aggravated

Jeez, so many (okay, just two) callbacks in this strip. As my archive grows ever larger and more intimidating I'm gonna have to watch out and make sure new strips don't devolve entirely into references to things that happened hundreds of strips ago.
Also you will be pleased to know that in a fit of holiday cheer I have ordered my legal team to allow David Willis' various websites to continue operating even as I pursue legal action against him for his heinous, impertinent theft of my characters. I expect to literally own him by the end of the year, but I figure I might as well allow him the small mercy of pretending he still controls his own fate.
(Before you email me THAT LAST PARAGRAPH WAS A JOKE. Some of you people have no grasp of the concept of sarcasm.)
One last thing: this coming weekend I will be in Austin, TX for WEBCOMICS RAMPAGE! I've never been to Austin before, I hope some of you will show up and say hi. That would be rad.
See you tomorrow!
Only a SuperBowl tastes sweeter than a victory over the hated Cowboys. Once again, as in the playoff game at Dallas two years ago, all the talking heads picked Dallas, and once again all the so-called experts were wrong. If anyone had told me yesterday that Tony Romo would complete 41 passes and Eli Manning would complete 11, I would have figured the game for a Dallas blowout... but if anything, the final score should have been more lopsided in favor of the G-Men. The last Cowboys TD was a gimme in garbage time, and earlier in the game our Steve Smith let a sure TD catch go skipping off his hands. The keys to the victory were a pair of amazing plays, a catch-and-run by Brandon Jacobs, and a punt return for a TD by Domenick Hixon. You'll see them on the highlight reels this evening.
Will the G-Men make the playoffs? Well, they have a chance now... but the road ahead still looks pretty damn rough, with the Iggles next week and the Vikings at season's end. But for this one week, at least, life is magical and full of joy.
Pretty amazing week in the NFL all round. Evil Little Bill and his P-men were upset as well, the Saints had a close call and an amazing win (has Dan Snyder fired that kicker yet?), and the Raiders knocked off the Steelers with Bruce Gradkowski doing his best Kenny Stabler imitation. Things are getting really interesting.
And Dallas faces the Chargers next week. Maybe I won't need to kill Pat after all.
(P.S. Flozell Adams is a thug, and may be the dirtiest player in the NFL).
- Mood:
happy
We do, however, urge everyone to exercise extra caution on the roads. And please be aware that, while the storm appears to be over and most roads are just wet now, there may be icing in some places later. Conditions vary considerably around the region. So use your best judgment as to whether it's a good idea to venture forth from your area...
nothing to hide.
no secrets.
you're all fuckheads but i love you.
mothers.
good day.
- Mood:
cold. - Music:come dine with me.
- 12:24 @Charm_CityCakes YES!! PB&B cake has been my dream for FOREVER!! I want it. I NEED it!! #
- 17:09 @elliotharmon for its usefulness: www.raft.net (links to idea sheets for teachers, plus info for donors and volunteers) #
- 17:13 @elliotharmon Also www.onebrick.org does what it says on the tin. Website is OB's #1 cost, it facilitates everything the org does. #
- 17:14 @elliotharmon Although in terms of "modern" design they're not great, and some things could improve, but I think they succeed in function. #
- 17:22 @elliotharmon One more: www.medshare.org/ Overseas hospitals can apply and use their website to order cheap medical supplies. #
- 19:09 I have internet at home again! Yay! I wish it came with a fairy godmother, though, cuz my house is a MESS. #
But the one bright spot in all this is: in testing out the new pack of pads my mom bought, I am thrilled to discover that they are huge as hell. Not even indicated on the packaging. I could probably go for a day on one of these babies. And guaranteed no leak- they're *way* wider than the crotch of my panties. xD
Don't hate me Devin, it was funny!!
Buy new soviet monuments.
Find a better atheism.
Cut down to ten swords a day.
Lose ten unknown armies by March.
Tell my family about kung-fu squirrels.
( I hope to Buddha this journey is finally over )
What I'd like to know is who suddenly got itchy reading this. :)
The Jets beat the Bills of Buffalo last night in Toronto, which was good. Defense looked awesome, especially Darrell Revis, who completely shut down that loudmouth TO. Offense, not so much. And things got even worse on the offensive side of the ball when Mark Sanchez dove for a first down and hurt his OTHER knee, the one not already in a brace. Really, he's taking this "following in the footsteps of Joe Namath" thing too far. Kellen Clemens looked awful in relief. If Sanchez is seriously hurt, Gang Green is done.
And if not... well, there's still a slim chance we could make the playoffs. All we'd need to do is sweep our last four games, including the undefeated Colts and red-hot Bengals. That's going to happen, sure. Uh-huh.
But Rex does have the defense playing lights out, so that's something.
- Mood:
pleased

This is why you don't see more anecdotes in comics. It leads to walls of text.
See you Monday!
THE HORROR DRUNX
DECEMBER 2009 ONLINE MAGAZINE
IS HERE!
Just CLICK the cover below to read it!
THE PRISONER - The 1967 TV Legend and its 2009 remake!
"V" The Alien Invasion TV Series
SAW: THE VIDEO GAME! (review)
THE BOX (review)
EVILUTION (film / dvd review)
BASEMENT JACK (film / dvd review)
Voting is closed...

There, I fixed it for you Dave
dear everyone bitching about how I should've put this behind a cut because bawwww I look at LJ at work and almost got in trouble waaaawwwwww
Maybe you shouldn't be looking at livejournal at work
It's such a heartwrenching shame that the one saying that isn't Eric.
I can't fucking do this.
- Mood:
blank

